06 March 2008

Indecent Language and the Hoopleheads Who Use It

I thank whatever deity broadcast television currently deems fashionable for the Federal Communications Commission. They keep my mind free from the verbal defecation unpatriotic people like that George Carlin try to foist on me in their attempt to bring down our great nation. They make me so tinkled off, I just want to write emphatically!

I know that most regular people are decent, and they would never use profane language. But for some reason, a bunch of uneducated meanie-heads want to wreck our whole culture. I mean, Holy Cow! For Buddha's sake! They should all go forcefully auto-copulate!

What a bunch of physical characteristics unique to child-bearing persons! Obviously, someone needs to show these people that it is much easier to express one's self using much nicer language. Oh sugar plum! Maybe they're just confused, in a psychological way. Maybe they confuse wee-wees and lollipops when looking for something to appease their deep-seated Freudian needs.

Does it go back to family then? Maybe they had some Oedipal incestuous encounters which made them so silly. Then again, it might not be that; they could need more love. We could get them a gift! I think a pair of Parus major would be lovely!

Well, perhaps I can resolve my differences with the people who want to be able to say whatever they want. As long as they do what I say they should. For now, it's off to the store, and since the car's in the shop, I'll have to ride the ass. I mean, donkey.


Ben said...

if those madoqua only believed in using jeez louise and gosh, they wouldn't be on their way to heck.

Corn Corn said...

Do you remember when Bob Saget was on "Full House"? He was the FCC poster boy. However, he soon betrayed them to take part in unoriginal potty mouth comedy.