08 April 2008

What Would Jesus Drink?


A favorite pet topic of mine is alcohol use in Christianity. Some people think nobody should drink any alcohol at all, not even for communion (are you hearing this, B.T.?).


Hey guys, remember that one time Jesus turned WATER into WINE? Just to keep a party going?! For people who may have ALREADY been drunk.


And I think I here you say, "Yeah, sure, but the wine they drank then was weaker."


Except that everyone thought Jesus' wine was WAY BETTER.


And then you say, "But it was a special circumstance."


Except that Jesus HADN'T PLANNED ON DOING IT. And, he made approximately an ASSLOAD.


And then you say nothing. Because Jesus wants you to drink. In fact, most of the biblical references to wine in particular are positive, treating drinking it as a normal part of life. Awesome.

5 comments:

Ben said...

If I knew Jesus was coming to my party, I would make sure to run out of my favorite IPA. Jesus, we ran out of beer, is the party lost? What can be done?

tomtastic said...

JC is definitely a scotch man.

Mel said...

It was nonalcoholic wine. Everyone knows that! Those people were drunk on the spirit of the Lord. And I'm pretty sure they didn't have wine trails in those days. But there were a lot of people visiting the historic churches of the day. That's what any good Christian would have done.

Orchard said...

I think Jesus would drink absinthe and then he would get all psychedelic and start pantomiming parables with clown Clothes on or start singing kick ass love song to Mary Magdalene.

anna said...

hmm...because Jesus produced wine by the "assload," i guess i can feel better about buying wine in a box...