14 May 2008

God Will Kick Your Ass

In case you haven't heard, famous ass-kicker Chuck Norris is now famous ass-kicker Dr. Church Norris. That's right: Liberty University gave him a degree. Oddly, it was in humanities rather than ass-kickery. I'm not really sure why.

I would like to highlight two key points from this article. First, the following:

“The Lord has directed my steps now through the last 10 years. And I hope you’ll let Him direct your steps, because if you do, you can’t go wrong – I promise you," Liberty Journal reported.

Undoubtedly, the Lord has also directed all Chuck's roundhouse kicks. And punches. So, it wasn't Chuck Norris who kicked all those asses, it was God, kicking ass through Chuck Norris.

And the second point:

At the beginning of the ceremony, LU Chancellor and President Jerry Falwell, Jr. called Norris the "type of role model to young people that has become rare in the entertainment field."

You heard right, Hollywood. More asskicking. More taking names. More roundhouse kicks. In the name of Jesus.

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