21 November 2008

Three Things Arranged in Varieties of Weirdness

In some cases, awesome doesn't cut it. Explosions can be awesome like a James Bond movie or terrifying like the simultaneous and violent back-up of every toilet in Grand Central Station. When a package of flour inexplicably explodes in your kitchen, it is neither awesome nor terrifying, but it is weird and very often funny. So without only the most necessary commentary, three things arranged in varieties of weirdness.

SOMETHING THAT IS WEIRD IN AN ICONIC WAY

Whenever I think of how funny Dane Cook is, I immediately run head-first into the nearest wall, because Dane Cook is not funny in any way. Then, I try to think of something that is actually funny, and now that has become even easier to do.

SOMETHING THAT IS WEIRD IN AN IRONIC WAY

It's hard to decipher what exactly is the best part of this photo. I think it may be that Bush's hand seems to be showing the kid how to execute a fist bump, but his face tells us that this is possibly the first time he's ever done anything like it.

SOMETHING THAT IS WEIRD IN A DISTURBING WAY

Things in this photo that have potential: martial arts. Things that I'm not so sure about: the fact that this is an instructional book, that slapping someone in the balls has a classical name, the maneuver itself. This list is in no way exhaustive.

2 comments:

Scottish said...

Oh dear. You didn't even scratch the surface of that last one. My balls hurt just reading it.

violasororia said...

The Bush photo is priceless. Should be made into a poster.

That third one... sheesh, folks. I can think of better ways to die, I think.